Non-Performers At Karaoke Night

A certain persona was halfheartedly attempting to put the moves on my buddy the other evening.  Even through my beer induced haze, I could tell that the...um...worker (?) was barely giving an effort, perhaps it was too late in the day and he had been out in the hot sun all afternoon with no luck.  He was looking a little rundown and dejected.  I was longing for Wolf to show up and take him aside with a smirking "You're never gonna make it like that, Kid..."

When Gravity Attacks

Was it a festive evening ending in calamity?  A run at a hip new urban sport ending in calamity?  My own brand of plain-ol' clumsy ending in calamity?  Red Line run-in ending in calamity but not a glass eye? 

So many questions...so few answers...so many me not seeing him at the Spotlight...

So Get THIS, Frankie!!

Okay, so I go out Saturday morning to the Spotlight and was feeling all drunk from the night before.  Instead of taking my normal seat at the end of the bar near the bathroom, I sat at the front talking with Percy and Mark.  Now, Mark has let it be known several times that he has some kind of problem with me but it's always when he's really drunk so I just always assume it's the beer talking.

So we're in some conversation that I don't remember and at one point I laughingly say that I was going to pour my beer on him.  His whole demeanor changes and then he gets up and pours his beer on me!  I know, right?!  I felt like one of those cads or vixens in 1930's movies that were always getting drinks thrown in their faces!  It was quite fabulous and I had a very good laugh about it later.

I hate you had to miss this spectacle because it was some grand entertainment.  Unfortunately I wasn't wearing any eyeliner so there was no smeared eye-makeup to make it that much crazier.  Now, that would've been a sight!  Normally, I just like to watch the drama rather than be a part of it, but...eh...we all have to do our part for the cause of "atmosphere" right? **laughing**

School & Beer & Regurgitated Raviolis (Perhaps)...

Hmmm, so it was a 3-alarm-drunk weekend, Frankie!  Friday night, Saturday afternoon, and Sunday afternoon.  I don't know what I was thinking!  When I got to class Monday night, I was still in such a haze I could barely concentrate.  (On a side note, the bus that I took after class had apparently stopped in Crazy Town because there were some REAL CHARACTERS on that mug.)  I'm sitting at the bar on Saturday afternoon doing the whole barstool dancing thing and this lady (Renee?) was looking at me like I had lost my damn mind.  Either that or she was wondering why there were triplets moving in synchronized motions next to her.  I hope it was amusing.  The only thing that stood out about Sunday was the back brace/corset/truss/girdle tightening incident involving huge breasts and a 1940's chapeau...

I went to see "The Crucible" on campus Thursday night.  I know, right?  Me going somewhere other than the bar?  I was very impressed and was barely holding it together by the end.  I could feel the emotion program booting up and struggled to override it!  I was taking notes during the performance because we had a paper to write on it for Humanities.  That was an effort because I didn't want to stop watching long enough to write down whatever scribbling I was doing.  The paper turned out to be my wishy-washy commentary on nobody's politics in particular and how the play could've been written about today's political state, but I plan on doing a second one for our final that focuses on the performances and how great I thought the whole effort was.

All of the actors were skinnier than me!!!  No Cakesters today!  If I hadn't already eaten those raviolis and meatballs, I'd save them for tomorrow (perhaps a purging?).  And I know actors are in general going to be a lot cuter than your average schlubs, but I thought this was a particularly easy-on-the-eyes cast, particularly the one playing Putnam, Spencer Steeby (even a great name!).

Frankie, you MUST make it out in order to see Red Line Ron's new glass eye!

I Seem To Recall This Persona...

Sexy Benji sent me this photo from my evening at The Spotlight last night (which, by the way, unfortunately did not include an appearance by Frankie).  I remember having a long conversation with this persona, but I did get an antagonistic feeling when I saw the photo.  I'm thinking I was secretly hating him because his skin is clearer than mine and he doesn't have a missing tooth.  BITCH!!

Hmmmm, all this talk about the Spotlight is making me want to go and play Ain't No Way on the jukebox and annoy Tony...

"You Wanna Get Down On This Protein Shake?"

Is this new?  Male reproductive organs are being called protein shakes?  I really need to start checking into the Urban Dictionary (*UPDATE* I checked and found out it refers to the reproductive fluid, at which point I slapped my forehead and went "Oh yeah, huh.") more often.  I will most definitely have to insert that term into some conversation, somehow...perhaps when I'm sitting at the Spotlight on Sunday or Saturday morning, flipping through the hooker section of Frontiers.  I'll spot one I like and exclaim, "I wanna get down on his protein shake!"  "Bro!" 

Two Photos

When Sam gave me this photo of me and Charles, he asked if I remembered taking it.  I laughed as he and I both know that I have no clue when this was taken.  I do appreciate them angling the shot to make me look my skinniest.  Ray & Charles at The Spotlight.

Notice in the reflection...am I grabbing Charles in an inappropriate way?

Secondly, we have the current condition of my legs.  Clumsiness.  I have to say, the one on my right leg hurt like a bitch!  The ashy legs, on the other hand, are just a product of pure laziness/don't-care-itude.

Two Photos

My boss brought this shirt for me from his last vacation.  I was most surprised when I took it out of the bag.  My clothes are generally pretty subdued, so I had to wonder what made him think I might like something this flashy.  I wore it at work the next day and actually, I do like it very much.  Somehow I feel like I should have a straw hat and a drink poured into a coconut shell.

Then we have what I consider flashy for me, my bar persona.  Where is everybody?  I could swear I remember there being a couple of customers in there!  (Georgie was in the shot but I cropped him out, don't want to upset anyone.)  Seeing as how this photo was taken just a little bit before I left, I seem oddly composed.

Happy New(ly shorn toe nail) Year!!

So I finally decided to clip my jacked up toe nails last night.  Nobody ever sees my feet, so I feel no compunction to keep them at all presentable.  This hard-as-diamonds clipping came off of my big toe.  It had started snagging on the elastic in my socks so something had to give. (This picture makes me want to get my palm read...)

I'll be ringing in the New Year at the newly reprieved Spotlight Bar.  Yes, it is the dreaded Karaoke night, but I'm holding out hope against hope that they are actually going to have strippers tonight.  It's a special occasion!!  There should be dancers!!  Of course, I know there will be no dancers, but one can fantasize.  At least karaoke keeps me from wasting my shekels in the jukebox (wasted because we all know Robbie would put in whatever large amount, do "Play Mine First" on all of his selections and keep us in dreary slow jazz for 3 hours.) and keeps them going to beer, where they should be going.  Let there be slut-baggery going on that I can ogle from the sidelines and get a vicarious thrill!!

Let there be Frankie!!

Let me not try to get into that red tank top because I feel too bloated to wear it!!  Let there be a Lakers game on so I can eyeball Shannon Brown and Luke Walton!!  Let me not get the evil eye because I insist on playing "Whip My Hair" again!!

Christmas Eve Drunkeness

Benji at the Spotlight emailed these photos of me sporting his Santa cap last night.  Oddly, I actually remember taking these photos...

Somebody Call Anne Rice...

Has there ever been a more vampire looking group, like, ever?

Ray Avito, Jeffie Spacecake, Cristiano of Hollywood, and $EX Artiste.  I don't recall when or where (probably the Spotlight) this photo was taken...I like it.

Cristiano is the cutest thing ever.  AND he's the best chef ever.

I Feel Like Celebrating!

Okay, so two of my grades have come in and both are A's!  I swear, if I hadn't gotten an A in PRE-Algebra, I was going to have to rethink things.  My last final this semester will be Saturday and it involves writing so I'm not sure how well that's going to turn out.  Right now, I shall revel in my temporary 4.0 GPA.

So I go out to the Spotlight after class last night and my favorite Go-Go Boy is there in street clothes.  Seeing as how I wasn't in my normal get-up (tons of eye makeup, sleeveless shirt, hat, boots, shorts), we both were like strange alter egos of our normal bar selves.  (That sentence made no sense.  This is why I'm worried about my final essay Saturday.  No time for revisions!)  I can never remember his name, the Go-Go Boy, that is.  It's something really hot like Giovanni or something.  He saw my psychology book sitting on the bar and mentioned that he has an AA in psychology.  Okay, look...cute as heck, great lips, friendly AND smart?  Get-outta-town.  Man, if I were still bothering with dating, I'd be putting the hard press on that one.

***NOTE TO FRANKIE*** I'm emailing this link to you as it seems you have lost my blog link and I miss your commentary.  I haven't had any squirrel or gopher related news in some time.  DUCK DUCK DUCK!  Maybe I'll see you out tonight?

Where Were You, Drunken Abstract Jesus?!

Wow, so my last math test clowned me but good.  I don't know if I was distracted or what, but I made some RIDICULOUS mistakes that can only be described as a serious lack of focus.  I ended up scoring a 78.  SEVENTY EIGHT!!!  We only have a total of 4 tests in the class, which will be averaged for our final score.  So far I have a 91 and a 78; I'm going to have to really ace the next two in order to get my average back up to an acceptable place!

So after receiving that disaster in class Monday, I went out to the Spotlight.  (They've got "Whip My Hair" on the jukebox now, so of course I had to play it twice!  Go Willow!)  After about 6 beers, I drew this sort of abstract-ish Jesus on the cross.  I'm going to leave Drunken Abstract Jesus in my notebook so he can use his magic powers to help me get 100% on my next test!  (Go Drunken Abstract Jesus!)

Well, That's Just PERFECT...

Let the self-flagellation begin!!  Napoleon gave us his our test today and after we had all finished, and he had taken the papers up, he went over the answers on the board.  I ROYALLY SCREWED UP THIS ONE PROBLEM.  Now I'm convinced that I did a belly flop on the whole thing.  I remember the particular problem and thinking that it seemed kind of long, but I soldiered on, all the way to the wrong answer!  Crappers.  I'm going to wear a hair shirt until next Monday as punishment.

Okay, now that I've got that out of my system, I think I probably did pretty good on the test (PRAYING TO NON-EXISTENT TEH GOD), but this shaken confidence is going to make me study that much harder for Professor Smurf's test on Wednesday.

On an unrelated but fantastic side note:  YAY for going out to watch strippers at The Spotlight Bar last Saturday!  BOO for passing out on the floor Saturday night/Sunday morning!

Drunken Sports Fans Will Battle It Out With Bad Singers @ The Spotlight Tonight

Bone-crunching football will compete against ear-piercing caterwauling tonight at The Spotlight as Karaoke Night plays second fiddle to the Saints/Vikings/Hurricane Katrina's Ghosts Slugfest @ The Superdome!!